The Monique Dolman Show
The Monique Dolman Show is your space for bold thinking, courageous action, and becoming unshakeable in who you are and how you live.
With a journey spanning from professional dancer to Women’s Mentor and building 3 x 6-figure businesses, Monique Dolman has dedicated the past 13 years to helping thousands of women create powerful and transformative life changes.
This podcast is for women who know they’re made for more — more truth, more confidence, more alignment, more life. Women who are done second-guessing themselves and ready to trust their own voice, back their own path, and move with power.
Through raw solo episodes and powerful conversations, Monique explores self-trust, mindset, confidence, relationships, leadership, personal growth, and what it really means to lead yourself through life.
This is for the woman who wants to stop shrinking, stop doubting themselves and start living in full alignment with who she truly is.
If you’re ready to think bigger, move braver, and become the woman you know you’re here to be — welcome to The Monique Dolman Show.
The Monique Dolman Show
23. Your Problem Isn't The Problem.. The Protection It Gives You Is.
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Most people think their problem is the problem.
But often, the real issue is the protection the pattern gives them.
In this episode, Monique dives into the psychology of secondary gain — the unconscious emotional payoff behind self-sabotage, overthinking, procrastination, people pleasing, perfectionism, and staying stuck in familiar patterns.
We unpack:
- why change can feel threatening to the nervous system
- how familiar pain often feels safer than unfamiliar growth
- the hidden ways people protect themselves from rejection, failure, pressure, and vulnerability
- and why taking responsibility for your life is one of the most empowered things you can do
You’ll walk away with powerful reflection questions to help you uncover your own secondary gain, understand what’s really keeping you stuck, and start shifting from self-protection into self-leadership.
Plus, message Monique on Instagram for the bonus freebie on how to turn your secondary gain into something productive instead of self-sabotaging.
Connect with me on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/monique_dolman/
Want to gain self trust?
Book in your FREE 30min clarity call with Monique today:
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Enquiries: moniquedolmancoaching@gmail.com